By my oh-so-clever title, you might have guessed that this post is about weight loss.
If you didn't, well...surprise!
So, for about a week now, I've been counting my calories again. And you know how stubborn you can get about not doing something because you know it will be hard?
Yeah, that's counting calories for me.
I know that monitoring my food intake will help with my weight loss. It makes perfect sense logically. It's the not-predictable factors that usually leave me questioning.
And I know my weight loss shouldn't be tied into focusing on the number. But honestly? I need something to track it.
So, last weekend (the holiday weekend) I set a goal of losing about 5 pounds by my beach trip weekend, so to be about 161.5 for Aug 8. I thought that was a feasible goal, allowing upcoming known big meals to be had without hindering me.
After a week? I'm already down to 163.1, leaving me 3.5 weeks to lose 1.6 pounds. Thankfully, I had a stretch goal of 160 in mind when I made the original goal, so we might have to try for that.
It's strange. Even though I should be using this to motivate myself more, that voice in the back of my mind is rearing its ugly head. It says This is just water weight...you're gonna plateau soon...you'll go back up.
The fact that I'm always waiting for the other shoe to drop when it comes to losing weight is just indicative of how effective that nasty voice is with me. I'm used to failing when it comes to this.
Which, overall, doesn't make sense. At my largest, I was 215. Now, here I am, 50 whole pounds smaller, and I still can't tell myself that I can do this. Even after I gained 20 of that 50 back, and lost it again.
And trying to explain this mindset to someone who has never had to go through it is one of the hardest things I've ever done. I can't explain it.
If you didn't, well...surprise!
So, for about a week now, I've been counting my calories again. And you know how stubborn you can get about not doing something because you know it will be hard?
Yeah, that's counting calories for me.
I know that monitoring my food intake will help with my weight loss. It makes perfect sense logically. It's the not-predictable factors that usually leave me questioning.
And I know my weight loss shouldn't be tied into focusing on the number. But honestly? I need something to track it.
So, last weekend (the holiday weekend) I set a goal of losing about 5 pounds by my beach trip weekend, so to be about 161.5 for Aug 8. I thought that was a feasible goal, allowing upcoming known big meals to be had without hindering me.
After a week? I'm already down to 163.1, leaving me 3.5 weeks to lose 1.6 pounds. Thankfully, I had a stretch goal of 160 in mind when I made the original goal, so we might have to try for that.
It's strange. Even though I should be using this to motivate myself more, that voice in the back of my mind is rearing its ugly head. It says This is just water weight...you're gonna plateau soon...you'll go back up.
The fact that I'm always waiting for the other shoe to drop when it comes to losing weight is just indicative of how effective that nasty voice is with me. I'm used to failing when it comes to this.
Which, overall, doesn't make sense. At my largest, I was 215. Now, here I am, 50 whole pounds smaller, and I still can't tell myself that I can do this. Even after I gained 20 of that 50 back, and lost it again.
And trying to explain this mindset to someone who has never had to go through it is one of the hardest things I've ever done. I can't explain it.